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Understanding Your Child’s Inconvenient Behavior
Introduction:
This week, we’ll explore how to understand your child’s inconvenient behavior, focusing on the emotions and challenges behind their actions. We’ll also reflect on the value of building intrinsic motivation rather than relying on rewards or punishment.
Task 1: Reflecting on Your Child’s Inconvenient Behavior
1. Think of a recent moment when your child’s behavior pushed your buttons. What was their behavior, and how did you feel in response?
2. What do you think your child was trying to communicate through that behavior?
3. How can you adjust your response to better address the emotion behind your child’s behavior rather than reacting to the behavior itself?
Task 2: Recognizing Developmental Stages
1. Have you noticed your child becoming more frustrated right before mastering a new skill (e.g., talking, walking, solving problems)?
How does this understanding change your perspective on their inconvenient behavior?
2. The next time your child has a tantrum or outburst, try to remind yourself that it’s part of their growth process. How will you respond differently with this in mind?
Task 3: Shifting Away from External Rewards
1. Reflect on how you typically motivate your child (e.g., through rewards or punishment). How does this approach affect your child’s behavior and sense of responsibility?
2. How can you encourage intrinsic motivation in your child—for example, involving them in household tasks because they want to help rather than expecting a reward?
Final Reflection
1. How has this lesson changed your perspective on your child’s inconvenient behavior?
2. What steps can you take to foster more intrinsic motivation in your child, so they behave well out of empathy and responsibility, not for rewards?
Progress Tracker
Use this section to evaluate your progress in understanding your child’s behavior and fostering intrinsic motivation.
Quantitative Tracking
1. How often were you able to recognize the emotion behind your child’s inconvenient behavior this week?
On a scale of 1-5 (1 = Rarely, 5 = Frequently):
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2. How often did you avoid using external rewards (like bribes or sticker charts) and focus on building intrinsic motivation instead?
On a scale of 1-5 (1 = Rarely, 5 = Frequently):
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3. How confident do you feel in responding to your child’s behavior with empathy and understanding rather than frustration?
On a scale of 1-5 (1 = Not confident, 5 = Very confident):
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Qualitative Tracking
1. What was the most significant insight you gained from reflecting on your child’s inconvenient behavior this week?
2. How did focusing on intrinsic motivation rather than rewards or punishment change your child’s behavior?