
Managing
Ineffective Parenting Styles
Goal:
To help parents identify and overcome ineffective parenting styles, improve communication with
their children and partner, and implement practical, consistent strategies for positive parenting.
Step 1: Identify Your Parenting Style
Review the list of ineffective parenting styles below and reflect on which one(s) you may
occasionally slip into:
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Angry/Frustrated Parent: Prone to yelling or losing temper quickly.
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Avoidant Parent: Withdraws from parenting duties, often avoids conflict.
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Clueless Parent: Feels overwhelmed and does nothing to address issues.
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Disorganised Parent: Lacks structure or routine in the household.
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Excusing Parent: Makes excuses for poor behavior instead of setting boundaries.
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Loud Parent: Relies on shouting or aggressive tone to manage situations.
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Nagging/Hypocritical Parent: Constantly criticises or sets unrealistic standards.
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Undermining Parent: Contradicts their partner or is inconsistent in setting rules.
Self-Reflection:
Which of these parenting styles do you find yourself using, even if only occasionally? (Check all
that apply)
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Angry/Frustrated Parent
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Avoidant Parent
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Clueless Parent
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Disorganised Parent
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Excusing Parent
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Loud Parent
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Nagging/Hypocritical Parent
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Undermining Parent
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What emotions tend to trigger these behaviors in you? (e.g., stress, frustration, exhaustion)
Step 2: Set a Goal for Change
Choose one parenting style to work on for the next two weeks. Describe why you chose this style
and what your goal is in changing this behavior.
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Example: I chose the Angry/Frustrated Parent style because I often lose my temper when my
children don’t listen. My goal is to remain calm and respond to situations with patience instead of
anger.
Step 3: Action Plan
Develop an action plan to address the ineffective parenting style you’ve chosen to work on. Think
of concrete steps you can take.
Example for Angry/Frustrated Parent:
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When I feel anger rising, I will take a deep breath and count to 10 before responding.
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I will set aside 10 minutes each day to check in with myself emotionally and reduce stress.
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I will communicate my feelings to my partner, and we will agree on a consistent approach to discipline.
Step 4: Tracking Progress
For the next two weeks, keep track of your progress by recording your experiences below.
Daily Tracking (Quantitative):
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Rate how well you managed to avoid the ineffective parenting style each day on a
scale from 1 to 5 (1 = Not at all, 5 = Extremely well).
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Identify what helped or hindered your progress each day.
Weekly Reflection (Qualitative):
At the end of each week, take a moment to reflect on how you feel about your progress. What
changes have you noticed in your behavior? How has this affected your relationship with your
partner and children?
Step 5: Involving Your Partner
Share your action plan with your partner and involve them in the process. Make sure both of you
are aligned in your approach to parenting, as consistency is key.
Partner Reflection:
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How can your partner support you in changing your parenting style?
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​What changes can you make as a couple to be more united in your parenting
approach?
Step 6: Ongoing Assessment
After two weeks, assess whether your efforts have led to improvement. If necessary, adjust your
goals or action plan and continue working on your chosen parenting style. Consider moving on to
another style once you feel you have made significant progress.
Step 6: Ongoing Assessment
After two weeks, assess whether your efforts have led to improvement. If necessary, adjust your
goals or action plan and continue working on your chosen parenting style. Consider moving on to
another style once you feel you have made significant progress.
Quantitative Assessment:
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How often did you revert to your old parenting style? (Daily/Weekly)
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​Did the frequency of ineffective behavior decrease over time? (Yes/No)
Qualitative Assessment:
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What emotional or behavioral changes did you notice in your children?
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How has the consistency in parenting impacted the overall mood at home?
Bonus Exercise: Creating a Routine for Success
If your parenting style is affected by disorganization, set aside time to establish a daily or weekly
routine with your family. For example:
Bonus Exercise: Creating a Routine for Success
If your parenting style is affected by disorganization, set aside time to establish a daily or weekly
routine with your family. For example:
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Morning routine: wake up, breakfast, school prep.
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​Evening routine: homework, dinner, playtime, bedtime.