A Task-Centred Approach to Parenting for Daily Routines for your child

Quick Responses to Help Children Develop Structure, Independence, and Responsibility

 

Preschool (Ages 3-5)

 

Young children thrive on predictability and benefit from structured routines with gentle reinforcement.

 

Scenario 1: Child Resists Morning Routine (e.g., Won’t Get Dressed)

 

❌ “Just do it! We’re late!”

✅ Parent: “Let’s play a game—can you get dressed before I count to ten? Ready… go!”

 

Scenario 2: Child Struggles to Follow a Visual Timetable

 

❌ “You never listen! Follow the schedule!”

✅ Parent: “Look at our chart—what comes next? That’s right, it’s time to brush your teeth. Let’s do it together!”

 

Scenario 3: Child Complains About Meal Rules

 

❌ “Stop whining and just eat!”

✅ Parent: “At mealtime, we sit at the table together. You don’t have to eat everything, but let’s enjoy family time.”

 

Scenario 4: Child Resists Bedtime Routine

 

❌ “If you don’t go to bed, no stories tomorrow!”

✅ Parent: “I know you want to stay up, but our bodies need rest. Let’s pick a bedtime story together!”

 

Middle Childhood (Ages 6-10)

 

Children at this stage can understand the benefits of organisation but may still need reminders and encouragement.

 

Scenario 1: Child Forgets to Pack Their School Bag

 

❌ “Why can’t you ever remember anything?”

✅ Parent: “Let’s check your timetable together—what do you need for today?”

 

Scenario 2: Child Doesn’t Want to Follow the After-School Routine

 

❌ “Do your homework right now, no excuses!”

✅ Parent: “Homework time starts at 4 PM. Do you want to do it at the table or in your room?”

 

Scenario 3: Child Complains About Eating Together at Dinner

 

❌ “Just sit down and eat like everyone else!”

✅ Parent: “Family dinners help us stay connected. Let’s all share one fun thing from today before we eat.”

 

Scenario 4: Child Rushes Through Nighttime Routine

 

❌ “If you don’t brush your teeth properly, you’ll have cavities!”

✅ Parent: “Let’s check off each step on your bedtime chart. What’s the last thing we do before sleep?”

 

Puberty (Ages 11-13)

 

Pre-teens need structure but also value independence—balance guidance with giving them control over their routines.

 

Scenario 1: Pre-Teen Wants to Sleep In and Skip the Morning Routine

 

❌ “Get up now or you’re losing your phone for the day!”

✅ Parent: “Mornings feel tough sometimes. Would setting an alarm earlier help, or do you need a different morning routine?”

 

Scenario 2: Pre-Teen Forgets Homework but Blames Others

 

❌ “That’s your fault, not mine! Be more responsible!”

✅ Parent: “Everyone forgets sometimes. How can we set up a system to help you remember next time?”

 

Scenario 3: Pre-Teen Pushes Back on Mealtime Rules

 

❌ “You’re eating with us whether you like it or not!”

✅ Parent: “I get that you’d rather be on your phone, but family time is important. Let’s agree on a time when we all eat together.”

 

Scenario 4: Pre-Teen Leaves Evening Tasks Until the Last Minute

 

❌ “You should have been ready ages ago!”

✅ Parent: “A good night makes for a good morning. What’s one thing you can prep tonight to make things easier tomorrow?”

 

Adolescence (Ages 14-18)

 

Teenagers need flexibility within structure—allow them to take ownership of their schedules while keeping key routines in place.

 

Scenario 1: Teen Stays Up Late and Struggles to Wake Up for School

 

❌ “You made this mess, now deal with it!”

✅ Parent: “You seem exhausted. Let’s talk about what adjustments can help you get enough rest.”

 

Scenario 2: Teen Constantly Leaves Things Until the Last Minute

 

❌ “Why do you always procrastinate?”

✅ Parent: “I’ve noticed you’re struggling with time management. Do you want to brainstorm a schedule that works better for you?”

 

Scenario 3: Teen Refuses to Join Family Dinners

 

❌ “You’re so rude—put your phone away and sit with us!”

✅ Parent: “I respect your space, but family meals matter. Let’s pick one or two nights a week where we all eat together.”

 

Scenario 4: Teen Ignores Household Responsibilities

 

❌ “If you don’t help around the house, I’m taking away privileges!”

✅ Parent: “We all contribute to making the house run smoothly. How can we make a plan that works for everyone?”